I randomly have been thinking about our interconnectedness and how we are quite literally contributing to someone’s being. This being-ness correlates with the people they’ve been around. The way a person interacts with others, communicates, reacts, or regulates their emotions was likely influenced by someone else. That’s a lot of pressure if you think about it (think about the parent-child relationship, for example). And, it got me thinking: do I, Kennedy, leave people better? Did I impart something positive or meaningful during the time we were connected?
How to leave people better in everyday interactions…
When I was a new bedside nurse, my mentors and preceptors used to always encourage me to leave the shift (the patients themselves, their room, their carts) in better condition than I got it from the nurse before. No matter the type of dayshift or nightshift it was, I was encouraged to set the oncoming nurse’s shift up for success. I was a pediatric ICU nurse, so anything to make the next nurse’s shift a bit easier to walk into, the better. Was it always appreciated or recognized? No! Did I get a pat on the back? Hardly ever. Was the effort reciprocated? Depended on the nurse.
But, I knew that I would never have the reputation of leaving my patient or their room in a hot mess. And frankly, it was my responsibility to create and maintain a therapeutic, tidy space in an otherwise stressful environment.
Imagine this…
Have you ever thought about the impact you’ve had on a person after spending a significant amount of time with them? Or, thought about your imprint on their life for the season you were connected? Admittedly, you’d have to first have the maturity and self-awareness to recognize the mark you’re potentially leaving on someone before answering those questions. But, it is definitely food for thought.
Given the world we live in and the unprecedented times we’re navigating, I think it’s worth taking time to evaluate your imprint. Assess how you’re showing up in both your personal and professional relationships. Assess how you show up in brief, random encounters with people that you may never see again. How was your behavior toward them? Would the person on the receiving end of you recall something positive? Mean or cruel? Did you make them smile? Would they be angry? And on and on.
Ways to leave people better…
In my post “How you can make a different choice,” I wrote about the small actions you could take toward becoming the person you truly want to be. The same can be applied here. We could all afford to be a bit nicer, more patient, caring, honest, and a whole bunch more of other [reasonable-tolerable-acceptable] characteristics. Life is hard enough. Relationships are complicated as is. Why not try to leave those around us better than we found them? It could be your compassion that softens them. It could be your honesty that helps them to start to rebuild trust. It could be your openness that expands their vulnerability. You just never know- which dare I say is the point.
Yes, we’re all human and flawed humans at that, but why not try to leave our ‘close-to-best-versions’ of ourselves on people? I realize this is largely an oversimplification, but we can try, right? Leave people off than when you found them.
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